Now that we have finally made some progress on our Deployment Countdown and the homecoming date "seems" to be as certain as Navy-certain gets, I think the kids and I have finally gotten into the deployment groove. We all still miss Paul every day, but maybe the missing him is starting to be the norm. We know that each night we go to bed is one less night of blowing kisses to him in the air, and every morning we wake up is one morning closer to the morning we get to put on our homecoming outfits and go pick him up at the squadron. So we are groovin'; I feel like I am growing through this experience. Groovin' and growing is good for this Momma's soul.
Perhaps the groove is feeling pretty good since we just had two very special visitors in the last month. Paul's mom was out here for a week and when I say "Paul's mom" I mean "The Laundry Queen." No kidding. First time since Paul left in December that ALL of our clothes were clean. Dishes were cleaned and unloaded from the dishwasher BEFORE a whole other load of dirty dishes piled up on the counter. I kind of forgot those things were possible. In fact, Paul's mom did something even more impossible... or even more important... she gave me room to breathe, to play with the kids, and brought my enthusiasm for motherhood way way WAY up. Enthusiasm is good for this Momma's soul.
Our other special visitor was my childhood neighbor. We've known eachother since I was 6 1/2. We played Barbies, kick-the-can, and volleyball together. We lived nextdoor to each other and, for one summer, in the same apartment together. Her visit was a bunch of fun and totally, completely comfortable. Stacy helped the kids and I plant one of our neighborhood's garden boxes. We planted a bunch of herbs, strawberries (per Matthew's request), and wild flowers. We also planted a few flower boxes for our backyard - "red flowers" (per Grace's request). We watched a terrible movie and laughed all the way through it. We went to the gym two mornings in a row and laughed all the way through both of those mornings. Laughter is definitely good for this Momma's soul.
To top off all my soul nourishment, I got to spend this afternoon with a dear friend, her husband, and their tiny, perfect, completely adorable 2-day-old baby boy. Oh sweet Heaven, is he cute! Sweet baby smell, tiny little teeney diaper butt, cute little baby yawns, and those wonderous eyes peaking out and blinking and blinking are good for this Momma(who will not be having another tiny miracle of her own)'s soul.
So here we are on a Saturday night, watching a movie, and having a "camp out" in the family room. The kids and I are groovin' and I am feeling like my soul is ready for the next 4 months... or at least 4 weeks, when my mom visits!
Showing posts with label stay-at-home mom. Show all posts
Showing posts with label stay-at-home mom. Show all posts
Saturday, March 24, 2012
Wednesday, March 7, 2012
It Is What It Is... and It Won't Be What It Was Supposed To Be
I really really don't like the saying "It is what it is." My dad says it a lot. My husband says it a lot. It seems to be the man's verbal version of a shoulder shrug. I would prefer if we could discuss "it." What is "it"? How does "it" make you feel? Why is "it" happening? What can we do to change "it"? If "it" isn't going to go away, how can we best deal with "it?" See..... there's soooooo much to talk about! It is what it is.... and then some, thank you very much.
BUT.... alas, it is what it is. Paul's 4 1/2 month deployment has been extended (again) to 8 months. WHAT?! Remember, how I wrote before he left that this deployment was a "short" one? Yeah, not really anymore. "It" is shorter than some... but now kind of longer than most. Lame.
So here I am, 9 days after finding out that we have not 2 months left, but 6 months. (It's weird to be 2 1/2 months into a 4 month deployment and know that you have 6 months left... "it" is odd math.) Nevertheless, I'm sitting here telling myself it is what it is. I've been sad, very very sad; I've been mad; I've been lonely and frustrated and defeated. Now it is time to accept it, embrace it, and move on.
In order to accept "it" I've had very little work to do. When the Navy has your husband out in the middle of an ocean on a great big gray boat and then tells you they aren't letting him come home until they are good and ready, there's not much for a girl to do. You can't really say "No! I do not accept this information." So, I accepted it. Begrudgingly. It is what it is and it won't be what it was supposed to be.
Next came the task of embracing "it." This one has taken about a week or so. I'm not sure I've exactly embraced it fully, but I'm getting there. I have a pretty solid faith in God and His plan for me and my family. I know that God knows what is going on and I know He knows how I feel about it. I know that there are many people at our church praying for our family during this deployment and I know those prayers are making a difference. I can feel them making a difference! A lot of people say that everything happens for a reason, but I'm not sure how I feel about that in this situation. I can see this situation for what "it" is... other aircraft carriers are needing maintenance, other countries are acting goofy, my husband is in the military. So I'm not sure if God has a bigger, deeper reason for this, but I do know that "it" will strengthen my relationship with Him because I absolutely cannot get through the tough days and nights without a good amount of prayers. This one is so much bigger than me. It is what it is and it won't be what it was supposed to be.
Lastly, the time has come to move on. I have taken down our countdown calendar. I have (sort of) stopped looking for my homecoming outfit. Sitting around and thinking about what the countdown should be is not helpful and won't make my real countdown go any faster, so I had to stop doing that. I'm moving on. I bought myself tickets to see Kenny Chesney and Tim McGraw (WOOOOHOOOO)... which I thought would be a fun concert to see with Paul, but now know it will be a fun concert to see with friends. I am planning a weekend escape to Vegas with some of my Navy friends... we will be coming from California, Washington, Maryland, and Virginia. You know you're a Navy wife when. I broke the news to the kids that Daddy won't be home until after the summer is over. It is what it is and it won't be what it was supposed to be.
Accepting "it" required me to mentally be okay with the information; embracing "it" required me to find some emotional and spiritual peace with the information; and moving on is still requiring me to be active and physically make the choice to not sit around and mope or worry or feel defeated.
I'm pretty sure my husband and my dad can just say "it is what it is," and they don't need to blog about all of it, but what can I say..... it is what it is.
BUT.... alas, it is what it is. Paul's 4 1/2 month deployment has been extended (again) to 8 months. WHAT?! Remember, how I wrote before he left that this deployment was a "short" one? Yeah, not really anymore. "It" is shorter than some... but now kind of longer than most. Lame.
So here I am, 9 days after finding out that we have not 2 months left, but 6 months. (It's weird to be 2 1/2 months into a 4 month deployment and know that you have 6 months left... "it" is odd math.) Nevertheless, I'm sitting here telling myself it is what it is. I've been sad, very very sad; I've been mad; I've been lonely and frustrated and defeated. Now it is time to accept it, embrace it, and move on.
In order to accept "it" I've had very little work to do. When the Navy has your husband out in the middle of an ocean on a great big gray boat and then tells you they aren't letting him come home until they are good and ready, there's not much for a girl to do. You can't really say "No! I do not accept this information." So, I accepted it. Begrudgingly. It is what it is and it won't be what it was supposed to be.
Next came the task of embracing "it." This one has taken about a week or so. I'm not sure I've exactly embraced it fully, but I'm getting there. I have a pretty solid faith in God and His plan for me and my family. I know that God knows what is going on and I know He knows how I feel about it. I know that there are many people at our church praying for our family during this deployment and I know those prayers are making a difference. I can feel them making a difference! A lot of people say that everything happens for a reason, but I'm not sure how I feel about that in this situation. I can see this situation for what "it" is... other aircraft carriers are needing maintenance, other countries are acting goofy, my husband is in the military. So I'm not sure if God has a bigger, deeper reason for this, but I do know that "it" will strengthen my relationship with Him because I absolutely cannot get through the tough days and nights without a good amount of prayers. This one is so much bigger than me. It is what it is and it won't be what it was supposed to be.
Lastly, the time has come to move on. I have taken down our countdown calendar. I have (sort of) stopped looking for my homecoming outfit. Sitting around and thinking about what the countdown should be is not helpful and won't make my real countdown go any faster, so I had to stop doing that. I'm moving on. I bought myself tickets to see Kenny Chesney and Tim McGraw (WOOOOHOOOO)... which I thought would be a fun concert to see with Paul, but now know it will be a fun concert to see with friends. I am planning a weekend escape to Vegas with some of my Navy friends... we will be coming from California, Washington, Maryland, and Virginia. You know you're a Navy wife when. I broke the news to the kids that Daddy won't be home until after the summer is over. It is what it is and it won't be what it was supposed to be.
Accepting "it" required me to mentally be okay with the information; embracing "it" required me to find some emotional and spiritual peace with the information; and moving on is still requiring me to be active and physically make the choice to not sit around and mope or worry or feel defeated.
I'm pretty sure my husband and my dad can just say "it is what it is," and they don't need to blog about all of it, but what can I say..... it is what it is.
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| Our previous countdown calendar... after the news of the first extention. It's now in the trash (except for the pictures). |
Sunday, December 25, 2011
WEEK TWO: Another spare moment
***I started this blog yesterday, but didn't have time to finish... it's now 24 hours later, and I'm hoping to get it completed***
Merry Christmas, everyone! I am officially thrilled that this holiday went smoothly at our house but am equally thrilled that it's over. Now I just need to get through an Anniversary, New Year's Eve, and Valentine's Day and all the obvious "Day To Spend With Your Husband" celebrations will be over. One down, three to go. I'm hoping this one will be the most difficult for the following reasons:
Anniversary (this will be second-most-difficult): On our tenth anniversary, I will be hanging out with my sister, brother-in-law, and brand-new niece. I bet it will be sweet and cuddley and that will make me happy!
New Year's Eve: I have pretty much always hated New Year's Eve. I always wanted a movie-like New Year's Eve and it has NEVER happened. Once, in college, we went out to a bar that had a huge cover charge and was trying to be "fancy".... we were downstairs and heard the countdown start upstairs so we tried to run upstairs for the big moment, but missed it.... by the time we got upstairs we realized they were counting down downstairs and we managed to miss that one too. (What establishment hosts a fancy New Year's Eve party and doesn't coordinate the countdown?! Who manages to miss both?!) My best New Year's Eve was '05-'06... Paul and I at a friend's house, playing cards, toasting to "a baby in the New Year" (for them, not us) and we both ended up with new babies by the next New Year's! So.... I don't think this year's will be too difficult, except for the moment of the kiss... but I've been missing kisses for 2 weeks, so that's nothing new.
Valentine's Day: I'm also not a big fan of this "holiday" but still, to have Valentine's Day without the hubster will make it a little less exciting. However.... I will either be celebrating with my Spouse Club for our half-way party OR visiting besties in VA that weekend. Either will be exceptional.
So... now that the presents are opened and Santa is resting, I too can rest in the fact that I made it through Christmas without my favorite guy.
Below... if I can get it to work.... is a link to a bit of a video from Week Two that will be heading out to the boat in a few days. Hopefully a weekly video will help Paul from feeling out of the loop. (It's 10 minutes long... which is long when we aren't your family... and you can hear me sing "Happy Birthday" which isn't very in-tune... but it's really for Paul and he's okay with a long video of bad singing.)
Merry Christmas, everyone! I am officially thrilled that this holiday went smoothly at our house but am equally thrilled that it's over. Now I just need to get through an Anniversary, New Year's Eve, and Valentine's Day and all the obvious "Day To Spend With Your Husband" celebrations will be over. One down, three to go. I'm hoping this one will be the most difficult for the following reasons:
Anniversary (this will be second-most-difficult): On our tenth anniversary, I will be hanging out with my sister, brother-in-law, and brand-new niece. I bet it will be sweet and cuddley and that will make me happy!
New Year's Eve: I have pretty much always hated New Year's Eve. I always wanted a movie-like New Year's Eve and it has NEVER happened. Once, in college, we went out to a bar that had a huge cover charge and was trying to be "fancy".... we were downstairs and heard the countdown start upstairs so we tried to run upstairs for the big moment, but missed it.... by the time we got upstairs we realized they were counting down downstairs and we managed to miss that one too. (What establishment hosts a fancy New Year's Eve party and doesn't coordinate the countdown?! Who manages to miss both?!) My best New Year's Eve was '05-'06... Paul and I at a friend's house, playing cards, toasting to "a baby in the New Year" (for them, not us) and we both ended up with new babies by the next New Year's! So.... I don't think this year's will be too difficult, except for the moment of the kiss... but I've been missing kisses for 2 weeks, so that's nothing new.
Valentine's Day: I'm also not a big fan of this "holiday" but still, to have Valentine's Day without the hubster will make it a little less exciting. However.... I will either be celebrating with my Spouse Club for our half-way party OR visiting besties in VA that weekend. Either will be exceptional.
So... now that the presents are opened and Santa is resting, I too can rest in the fact that I made it through Christmas without my favorite guy.
Below... if I can get it to work.... is a link to a bit of a video from Week Two that will be heading out to the boat in a few days. Hopefully a weekly video will help Paul from feeling out of the loop. (It's 10 minutes long... which is long when we aren't your family... and you can hear me sing "Happy Birthday" which isn't very in-tune... but it's really for Paul and he's okay with a long video of bad singing.)
Thursday, August 4, 2011
Kids Say the Dang Darndest Things
Yes, I know you know kids are funny. Dude. There used to be a whole show about it. They come up with the goofiest, silliest, most philosophical stuff. Kids. Are. Funny.
However, I'm dedicating this post to the hilarity of some things that have come out of my kids' mouths. I won't even be able to remember all the silly things they've come up with but there are a few that deserve a moment in the blog-light.
First, kiddos start off saying just random funny things. It's not because they're trying to be funny or witty or smart. They're just too little to get it right. And that itself is funny. My daughter used to walk around saying the "F" word. It's not a word my husband and I use frequently, if at all, but it was what she thought a duck said. "Quack, quack, quack!" Sweet little pig-tailed 18-month-old walking around swearing like a sailor. Well, a sailor with a one-word vocabulary.
A good friend of mine has a daughter who used to crack us up with her word mix-ups. When she was just a wee one and was trying to do something difficult, she would say, "It's too HEAVY." Ha. It usually did not have anything to do with weight, but that was just the word she grabbed onto.
Then the little toddlers seem to morph into whole new funny beings.
My kids started asking particularly bizarre and funny questions:
"Mom, what if my toes fall off?" - uh... huh??
"Daddy, did you know that the sun is the lightbulb in the sky?" - ohhh, he's sooo smart!
"Daddy, did you know Mommy is my MOMMY?!" - ohhhh, not that smart!
And saying funny things:
"My best buddies are Jacob, Matt Matt, and the cow at Chic-Fil-A." - <snicker snicker>
"Mom, why don't you bring me my breakfast on a tray that you carry on your head? Cinderalla and Rapunzel can do it." - <chuckle chuckle>
"How big is Sam?! Soooooooooo... medium!" - <snort!>
The funnies are continuing to build today. They are spending time with other silly kids at summer school and coming home telling me that I might be "lactose intolerant." They are memorizing Disney movies and walking up to people saying, "Frying pans! Who knew?!" (Tangled, in case you didn't know the movie reference.) They are using their little growing brains to talk themselves out of trouble "I wasn't meaning to kick him [her brother] in the face, I was just practicing what I would do if a stranger tries to snatch me. You TOLD me to!"
The kids are just funny. And some days, nothing feels better than to laugh so hard I start snorting.
However, I'm dedicating this post to the hilarity of some things that have come out of my kids' mouths. I won't even be able to remember all the silly things they've come up with but there are a few that deserve a moment in the blog-light.
First, kiddos start off saying just random funny things. It's not because they're trying to be funny or witty or smart. They're just too little to get it right. And that itself is funny. My daughter used to walk around saying the "F" word. It's not a word my husband and I use frequently, if at all, but it was what she thought a duck said. "Quack, quack, quack!" Sweet little pig-tailed 18-month-old walking around swearing like a sailor. Well, a sailor with a one-word vocabulary.
A good friend of mine has a daughter who used to crack us up with her word mix-ups. When she was just a wee one and was trying to do something difficult, she would say, "It's too HEAVY." Ha. It usually did not have anything to do with weight, but that was just the word she grabbed onto.
Then the little toddlers seem to morph into whole new funny beings.
My kids started asking particularly bizarre and funny questions:
"Mom, what if my toes fall off?" - uh... huh??
"Daddy, did you know that the sun is the lightbulb in the sky?" - ohhh, he's sooo smart!
"Daddy, did you know Mommy is my MOMMY?!" - ohhhh, not that smart!
And saying funny things:
"My best buddies are Jacob, Matt Matt, and the cow at Chic-Fil-A." - <snicker snicker>
"Mom, why don't you bring me my breakfast on a tray that you carry on your head? Cinderalla and Rapunzel can do it." - <chuckle chuckle>
"How big is Sam?! Soooooooooo... medium!" - <snort!>
The funnies are continuing to build today. They are spending time with other silly kids at summer school and coming home telling me that I might be "lactose intolerant." They are memorizing Disney movies and walking up to people saying, "Frying pans! Who knew?!" (Tangled, in case you didn't know the movie reference.) They are using their little growing brains to talk themselves out of trouble "I wasn't meaning to kick him [her brother] in the face, I was just practicing what I would do if a stranger tries to snatch me. You TOLD me to!"
The kids are just funny. And some days, nothing feels better than to laugh so hard I start snorting.
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