Thursday, August 4, 2011

Kids Say the Dang Darndest Things

Yes, I know you know kids are funny.  Dude. There used to be a whole show about it.  They come up with the goofiest, silliest, most philosophical stuff. Kids. Are. Funny.

However, I'm dedicating this post to the hilarity of some things that have come out of my kids' mouths. I won't even be able to remember all the silly things they've come up with but there are a few that deserve a moment in the blog-light.

First, kiddos start off saying just random funny things. It's not because they're trying to be funny or witty or smart.  They're just too little to get it right.  And that itself is funny.  My daughter used to walk around saying the "F" word.  It's not a word my husband and I use frequently, if at all, but it was what she thought a duck said. "Quack, quack, quack!" Sweet little pig-tailed 18-month-old walking around swearing like a sailor. Well, a sailor with a one-word vocabulary.

A good friend of mine has a daughter who used to crack us up with her word mix-ups.  When she was just a wee one and was trying to do something difficult, she would say, "It's too HEAVY." Ha. It usually did not have anything to do with weight, but that was just the word she grabbed onto.

Then the little toddlers seem to morph into whole new funny beings.
My kids started asking particularly bizarre and funny questions:
"Mom, what if my toes fall off?" - uh... huh??
"Daddy, did you know that the sun is the lightbulb in the sky?" - ohhh, he's sooo smart!
"Daddy, did you know Mommy is my MOMMY?!" - ohhhh, not that smart!

And saying funny things:
"My best buddies are Jacob, Matt Matt, and the cow at Chic-Fil-A." - <snicker snicker>
"Mom, why don't you bring me my breakfast on a tray that you carry on your head? Cinderalla and Rapunzel can do it." - <chuckle chuckle>
"How big is Sam?! Soooooooooo... medium!" - <snort!>

The funnies are continuing to build today.  They are spending time with other silly kids at summer school and coming home telling me that I might be "lactose intolerant."  They are memorizing Disney movies and walking up to people saying, "Frying pans! Who knew?!" (Tangled, in case you didn't know the movie reference.) They are using their little growing brains to talk themselves out of trouble "I wasn't meaning to kick him [her brother] in the face, I was just practicing what I would do if a stranger tries to snatch me.  You TOLD me to!"

The kids are just funny. And some days, nothing feels better than to laugh so hard I start snorting.


  1. More funny things those kiddos say: "Grandma, no one at the pool really likes the hat you are wearing." Or "Grandma, do you have any kids?"

  2. Yep! I should have been writing these things down!