I'm getting ready to head home to Illinois this afternoon. I realize that I don't really consider Illinois to be Home, since my own little family isn't there. I don't really consider Maryland to be Home either, although that is where my own little family lives. We've been here for three years, but are preparing to get "on the road again."
I have developed an attitude of like and dislike for every place the Navy has sent us. I'm pretty sure I have unconsciously (consciously now, I guess) decided that to like a place a lot would be to guarantee heartache when it's time to leave. However, I can't hate every place we live because that would make for some long tours. I'd like to think I have a pretty optimistic view of most things... try to see the glass as half-full, but when it comes to places where we lived for 6 months to 3 years I'm pretty sure I maintain a half-full/half-empty balance. Such is the life of a military wife.
The funny, or not-so-funny, thing is that at our current location, I've had a hard time seeing that glass as half-full. I've met a handful of GREAT people, we bought our first house, and we had our third baby here, but overall I've been mentally refilling the cup only to find it empty a few days later. Bah. Maybe that's why I'm so anxious for these next orders; a fresh start, a clean slate, a unbiased viewpoint... that's what I need!
So as I head home-that-used-to-be-home-but-really-doesn't-feel-like-Home-anymore, I know that my true Home will always be where ever my husband and children are. (Awe, cheesey.) But I know if you have been transient you will know what I mean despite the cheese. My heart is most happy, content, safe, and secure when I'm with my life-long pal and three munchkins.
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